A lot has been written about vision, drive, decisiveness, strategic thinking, and other important traits for effective leadership.

But there are three traits I believe are just as essential yet rarely get the attention they deserve.

Let me share those with you.

1) The ability to STAY

When things get hard, tense, loud, or quiet, brilliant leaders are conscious of staying. I don't just mean physically stay in the room - most leaders will do that. It's entirely possible to stay physically ... but leave emotionally or energetically. And that's understandable, right?

Leadership is not always easy, relationships can be intense, disagreement is necessary but can feel pointy, conflict can be exhausting, and often outcomes are uncertain.

It's natural to want to protect ourselves, and leaving is one way to get a bit of relief.

But the outcome is a leader who's a bit absent, less able to listen and feel into the moment, disconnected from their essence and the mood in the room - and therefore unable to influence and navigate it as effectively.

Learning to STAY is an ongoing learning journey, but an essential one for leaders and people who want better relationships, to make smarter decisions, and to bring their best selves to their work and lives.

2) Patience

Leaders often have drive, determination, and vision. Excellent traits... but are they balancing that out with patience?

Because at times patience is the secret sauce that keeps things flowing - patience with pace, people, and insights that need time to fully form and evolve.

Finding the sweet spot between drive and patience - and the discernment to know when to use what. That's a core leadership skill.

3) Kindness

Leadership doesn't happen in theory, it happens in relationships. So being kind should be a constant pillar in anyone's leadership style and approach. For some, this comes naturally, for others, they need to take a step back and look at their behaviours and assess their intended and unintended impact.

Being kind doesn't mean people pleasing; it can also mean giving someone the difficult feedback they need to hear in order to grow. It's about intention. And used wisely, kindness substantially increases your impact as a leader.

Psychological safety, relationships, growth, performance, and reputation all benefit from a consistently kind leader.

What traits do you appreciate in leaders and why?

Where in your work or life might you benefit from:

• Staying
• More patience
• Being kinder to others?

These three traits might not show up on a typical leadership competency framework. But they show up in the leaders people actually want to follow.

Your Next Read: The Power of Reflection in Leadership

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